Doing It Right

Sometimes when it's 12:30am and I'm analyzing my life choices and trying to break my menthol addiction, a weird thought crosses my mind - "I wonder if I'm doing this right." Now, obviously this is ridiculous. First, from my new standpoint as a consumer of data (#statistics), I should define "it" more clearly. Secondly, from a normal person's mind, who decides what's right? If indeed my tired, cough drop deprived brain is referring to life in general as the "it" in that question, isn't it in the very nature of my human independence to be able to define my own success or failure however I want?
But lesbihonest, we both know that's not true. I'm only sixteen and eight twelfths, still legally owned by my parents, and they and other adults in my life are a huge influence on my definitions of success. For example, getting a 34 on the ACT next week? Success. Not completely a single statistics assignment this week? Failure. Winning my category in forensics on Saturday? Triumph. Skipping sixth hour to go to the bakery behind my high school? Not so much. You see what I mean? Those aren't standards I've set entirely for myself.
As I'm sitting here blogging way past when my head wants to be asleep, I wonder if I'm doing this right. Then I (or at the very least my addled, sleep-deprived brain) decided that I don't really care.

If that isn't empowerment, I don't know what is.